Born Confused

My status “They are the heart broken lovers dancing on the glass they broke, their spit in each others mouths hoping to choke.”

PEEP: is that an original composiion
*composition
me: They are the heart broken lovers dancing on the glass they broke, their spit in each others mouths hoping to choke. Needle in the eye, stoke in the heart–only empathy and forgiveness will heal and leave them apart.
err, it’s not empathy is it
PEEP: *stake
me: ?
strook?
PEEP: stake in the heart?
me: i what the word for not caring
want*
instead of empathy
PEEP: apathy
me: apathy
yeah
PEEP: how can you have forgiveness with apathy
you have to care to forgive…
me: becuase not caring is the opposite of love and hate
to forgive is simply to write off
and not to gain anything from it
it’s turely a god-given thing
besides that
stroke?
pain of the heart?
heart attack
did I spell that right?
PEEP: yeah
but you cannot forgive without love
me: which one stake or stroke do you think?
umm, then maybe i should put foget
forget*
PEEP: yeah
it’s much easier to forget than forgive
me: cynical composition isn’t it? I am sure you liked the first one more
PEEP: stake makes more sense
yes
quite cynical
what is this an allusion to
me: it depends if forgiving and/or forgetting heals
more then the other
but I suppose but can heal, si?
both*
PEEP: not really
if you forget without forgiving
you’re not really healing
just burying your feelings and anger
you haven’t eradicated them
me: or it just dies off
you don’t really care
PEEP: but it can be reawakened at any time
and apathy is the death of the spirit
me: unless you go through something where apathy keeps your spirit alive
PEEP: yeah but
it should be a transitional stage at most
me: forgiveness in such cases isn’t tangible
PEEP: yeah but that’s just procrastinating
putting off summoning the courage to forgive
me: but I suppose I am talking in extreme cases–and I don’t feel courage has anything to do with it–somethings are simply unforgiveable
but back to the composition
the lovers
perhaps the orginial was best then
becuase they still feel or then they wouldn’t hate
PEEP: no case is too extreme for forgiveness
yes, hate is the antithesis of apathy
Sent at 1:32 PM on Wednesday
me: go through rape and then come back to me and say that no case is too exterme for forgiveness
and i put apathy in the compostion b/c yes it is the opposite
PEEP: the most beautiful man who ever lived was stoned near to death and humiliated in a way no animal ever was
and had the option of crushing a whole city between mountains
and yet he forgave
Sent at 1:35 PM on Wednesday
me: most women rather die
PEEP: the greater the pain, the greater the reward for finding peace
this does not mean you don’t seek justice
or that the proper punishment is laid down
I think all rapists should be castrated and left to bleed to death
but
with justice must come peace of mind, heart, and soul
and ultimately that only comes with forgiveness
not for the action
but forgiveness with the hope that God will guide them to the light
me: I have no true sentiment that such evil doers find ease ever
could you ever forgive Hitler?
PEEP: Hitler is dead
me: Honestly, could you?
PEEP: and so, no, I cannot forgive him
me: if he was alive
if you were in a camp
PEEP: you’re not seeing what I’m saying
me: I feel you’re being idealist to absurdity
PEEP: then tell me what you think of the prophet’s example
me: I feel it’s different. But because I am not sure why –just yet–I shall yield to you for now and keep the original composition: “they are the heart broken lovers dancing on the glass they broke, their spit in each others mouths hoping to choke. Needle in the eye, stake in the heart–only empathy and forgiveness will heal and leave them apart.”

talking about an event concerning the masjid

me:
yeah I was going to put a petition but then I talked to an inside and I diceded it would be wise to let things take it’s course

violent:
yeah you guys should just let it go
don’t try to push it
you won’t be able to change people’s minds

me:
OOOOOOOOOOOH girl bling bling
sean paul
eh?
when do you suggest standing for something then
do you ever protest anything?

violent:
you fight the battles that are worth fighting
when you know it’s something that will heal rather than bring more discord and divide

me:
You can’t please everyone. And we shouldn’t try. Thats like saying only fight the popular fights–a lot of the good isn’t popular

violent:
uh that’s not what I’m saying at all
what I mean is; if you’re going to fight, make sure it really is going to achieve what you hope to achieve
and that you’re not just fighting for the hell of fighting
out of anger
or bitterness
though it may sound like an oxymoron
you should only ever go to war
with peace in your heart

me:
Sometimes you feel peace in your heart because you believe in what your fighting for even if you know your lose
sometimes you simply need stand up for a cause
and show it’s not acceptable
or it’s wrong
or you don’t agree with it
discord make vibrant civil socities
we shouldn’t hinder from it
call it a oxymoron
but disunity and discord often gives birth to freedom

violent:
that may sometimes be true
but who’s to judge when discord will be fruitful and when it will only breed more fractures

me:
That’s based on the person they should have good intentions, sound knowledge and peace in thier heart so they may aquire wisdom. It’s a case by case thing as for fractures.. it’s life–it’s diversity and it’s beauty. We’re not all the same and it’s a sign from Allah.
And let it be a sign
embrace it
and do not let it weaken you
but derieve strenght from it
nor should we try to suppress it
we might not agree
but we can at least respect it
and that’s a higher form of human and a7lack

violent:
ok but
still
that doesn’t mean
fighting for your cause will always attain victory
if you can foresee that, in fact
fighting will only lead to more disunity
than it’s your duty to restrain yourself
and save your energy for the fights that really matter

me:
read my previous post–I think I had clarified that. And with help from an insider I had sound knowledge and therefore reframed.

me:
CHAY MAN–I gotta jet–a friend came over and said I was her “spiritual guide” and I am gonna take her out for coffee–I think something is up
salaam

violent:
lol ok
guide her well
beace

zeen: no fear shakespeare1
i dont even understand teh essay topic
which is due toorrow
Q:considering that language is mere “words words words” but which also speaks daggers, examine hamlet laertes or ophelia to explain how shakespeare demonstrates both the power and limitations of language which lacks meaning on its own throughout the play
me: like in quran
in language
words can’t hold the essence of Allah
but they can vaguely describe
with god-given voc
characteristics
of Allah
like “perfect”
zeen: hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
me: inifinte”
zeen: so the limitation, in that exmaple
me: we have no true concept of it
zeen: of language is that the being described is incomrpehensible for the human being, b/c we have no basis to compare
but the power therein, is that the words are from Allah, who is perfect in Himself
so obv theyre powerful wodss
but see i dont understand how to organize this paper
like……
i wanna say
language is made powerful when it is delivered with emotion and logic, but it is limited even then if the audience doesnt have context of what you are saying, if the audience has preconceptions about you, or doesnt get the subtelties
are those three separate points or just one?
me: seperate
you talk about the power of words
then the loss of them
upon an ignorant and prejudice audinece
zeen: what about the bits about the audience? can i just group them all together into “eperception”
me: eperception?
are they on the internet?
zeen: perception
i cant type
me: the subjects of perception
but everyone holds perception
zeen: IM SO CONFUSEDDDDDD
wait why are u awake this late on a sunday night m’dear
me: so perception is eventuable
zeen: u ppl
are too smart for me
i dont even know what eventualble means!
me: unaviodble
LOlz
(i can’t type either
zeen: yay!!
finally someone who cant type
like inevtiable

I say the wrong words trying to show i care, clumsily i am with words trying to lift the burden you bear, but know what i said was from the heart, telling you I care is a start but know I spoke from best intention—just in case i needed to mention. And I hold my breath on a guessing game, a tilt on balance, dangerous, scared on how this will be received but now that it’s said and done i feel a bit relieved. hand on chin i rub thinking trying to keep my heart from sinking but shall i pursuit in caring? or leave you with all the bearing–thus my heart tearing?

*title: inside joke*

I made him smile I made him laugh remember his warm eyes alight when he looked upon me with insight, persistence and deeply and my heart went aglow ever so slow until I left the scene and realized infatuation’s skeem had taken something from my heart, and a sweetness none too tart–damn it I thought I was smart.