Born Confused

zeen: no fear shakespeare1
i dont even understand teh essay topic
which is due toorrow
Q:considering that language is mere “words words words” but which also speaks daggers, examine hamlet laertes or ophelia to explain how shakespeare demonstrates both the power and limitations of language which lacks meaning on its own throughout the play
me: like in quran
in language
words can’t hold the essence of Allah
but they can vaguely describe
with god-given voc
characteristics
of Allah
like “perfect”
zeen: hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
me: inifinte”
zeen: so the limitation, in that exmaple
me: we have no true concept of it
zeen: of language is that the being described is incomrpehensible for the human being, b/c we have no basis to compare
but the power therein, is that the words are from Allah, who is perfect in Himself
so obv theyre powerful wodss
but see i dont understand how to organize this paper
like……
i wanna say
language is made powerful when it is delivered with emotion and logic, but it is limited even then if the audience doesnt have context of what you are saying, if the audience has preconceptions about you, or doesnt get the subtelties
are those three separate points or just one?
me: seperate
you talk about the power of words
then the loss of them
upon an ignorant and prejudice audinece
zeen: what about the bits about the audience? can i just group them all together into “eperception”
me: eperception?
are they on the internet?
zeen: perception
i cant type
me: the subjects of perception
but everyone holds perception
zeen: IM SO CONFUSEDDDDDD
wait why are u awake this late on a sunday night m’dear
me: so perception is eventuable
zeen: u ppl
are too smart for me
i dont even know what eventualble means!
me: unaviodble
LOlz
(i can’t type either
zeen: yay!!
finally someone who cant type
like inevtiable

The strength and joy of this man amazes me. He looks tired. I see his exhaustion, how he pushes himself, how he holds the cheeks of my brothers’ soft skin like he would to sons and how he tells them of the exciting video games at his house. He expertly hides his hard breathing.

All this despite the fact he just came out of the hospital… again.

I pause and speak. And then simply listen. Taking in the undercurrent of love happening within this conversation.

“You look different.”

I blink. “Really?” I give him a split second inquiry with my face that you can read like a book.

I realize he’s taking me in. I, inside myself note that maybe he’s referring to my loss in weight?… But instead … a moment passes as he leans back.

A certain stillness, a mood revealing how I feel inside… takes over.

I didn’t expect him to continue.

“You look thoughtful.”

I look at him.

My brother pipes up: “It the flashdrive,” pointing to my covered neck.

piece of advice:
ballu: sometimes people worry so much because they unconsciously percieve themselves as a vital part of the family
and indeed, they are a vital part of the family
but the rizq is always with Allah
I’ve seen it in my own family
when one source or stream of income is reduced or taken away, then Allah automatically opens another door
at first I would worry
now … I don’t, not at all

genocide, civil war, civil strive within a country? within borders man made classifications and boxes we put ourselves and dehumanize–we scrutinize for no reason, blood flows, hearts pump, love’s arts gives us all a lump, a strange feeling, , a hindrance, an ability–a security. But it’s nemesis: they call it genocide the wiping out, the distance relative of your mother– nay it’s between brother and brother there’s no such thing as a murder to no other.

On talking about the fear-zing post (sorry I took so long to post this)… I happen to witness an interesting discussion between two friends *popcorn*

person (12:50:40 AM):because I think the crown of wisdom is really higher consciousness
larka (12:54:14 AM): id rather seek that answer from someone who speaks from authority
person (12:54:21 AM):haha
person (12:54:23 AM):that’s fine
person (12:54:32 AM):but ultimately
person (12:54:41 AM):the task is on the individual soul
person (12:54:54 AM):to seek knowledge, enlightenment, and contentment
person (12:55:20 AM):and all of those are different for each and every seeker
person (12:57:22 AM):no matter what position of authority someone is in
person (12:57:33 AM):they can’t tell you the best way to please and express your love for your lord
person (12:57:45 AM):because God has made all as unique as snow flakes
person (12:58:28 AM):each pattern is exquisite and beautiful and completely different; but they’re all snowflakes and they all come from the same source
larka (12:59:22 AM): i enjoy talking about these things, but mainly with ppl who are willing to apply into action what they learn instead of offering arm-chair commentary, otherwise after a while its worthless discussing with someone about swimming for example if they never swam (which is what i mean by authority - i.e. someone who’s experienced himself what he’s talking about, i dont mean someone who is in some position like imam)
person (12:59:41 AM):ah wow
person (12:59:44 AM):harsh
person (12:59:48 AM):what does that mean exactly?
person (12:59:53 AM):putting it into practice?
larka (12:59:54 AM): “its nice to offer poetic opinions, lets see the real action”
person (1:00:01 AM):what does that mean?
person (1:00:06 AM):what would real action imply
person (1:00:25 AM):I can give you examples, I suppose, but really it’s a philosophy
larka (1:01:33 AM): “someone who *knows* the ins and outs details of the Jalal of Allah, and who acts accordingly”
person (1:02:12 AM):?
person (1:02:33 AM):why does it seem we overthink things?
person (1:03:25 AM):the main point I’ve been trying to make is that we should not cower in fear and let that guide our actions
larka (1:03:37 AM): that has authority”
larka (1:03:46 AM): but someone who says “oh i love Allah” but rarely ever for example sends salawat to Allah’s Prophet/Beloved… where is the authority in that?? where is the love? where is the proof?
person (1:03:47 AM):we should purify our intentions so that each and everything we do in life is transformed into an act of worship and an expression of love
larka (1:06:09 AM): im just saying there are ppl who speak from sultan (authority) and idhn (Divine permission), and other ppl who dont have that

larka (1:11:09 AM): “there are ppl that know for example that angels frequent a certain place, based on some hadith or another…. then there are people who go to that place and know the names of those angels… thats authority = direct experience of the knowledge passed down to us
larka (1:11:26 AM): there are ppl that heard from second-hard hearsay, or from some book, that the Prophet is alive… there are other people that go to Madina and offer salams to him, and hear him respond directly to them, thats authority
larka (1:11:48 AM): general statements like “purifying intentions” are good, but arent enuf for those people who want to go deep and arent satisfied with surface understandings of Islam
person (1:12:05 AM):no
person (1:12:11 AM):those people who are trying to go deep
person (1:12:18 AM):are trying to overanalyze
person (1:12:29 AM):those that try do be deep only ever end up drowning
person (1:12:39 AM):this is where sects arise
person (1:12:48 AM):different battling schools of thoughts
person (1:12:52 AM):all these different constructs
person (1:13:09 AM):dedicated to breaking apart and codifying and regulating our connection to God
larka (1:15:44 AM):u seem to think that by “going deep” i mean something mental or intellectual, which is missing the point entirely… no “overanalyzing” here, overanalyzing means that ur only using intellect and nothing else is being effected in you”
person (1:16:24 AM):then I really don’t understand the point this fellow is trying to make
person (1:16:37 AM):we’re talking about what motivates your actions
person (1:16:44 AM):the most basic of things
person (1:16:54 AM):I say the basic motivator should be love
person (1:16:58 AM):because that is the most sincere
larka (1:19:23 AM): well, you dont like the idea of “codifying” and “regulating” our conneciton to God… now some people experience God in that sense of cowering fear. are we gonna tell them “no u got it all the wrong way, u shudnt experience Him like that?
larka (1:19:41 AM):and if we’re talking about what motivates ppls actions, then your not really answering the topic of why/how the head of wisdom is the fear of Allah
person (1:20:14 AM):God is beautiful and loves beauty
person (1:20:19 AM):someone cowering out of fear
person (1:20:29 AM):is not appreciative of God’s beauty
person (1:20:36 AM):shadows cover everything
person (1:20:41 AM):and they’re frightened
person (1:20:49 AM):no one ever gets pleasure or contentment out of fear
person (1:21:21 AM):there’s no wisdom in constantly running and looking behind your back to see if you’re going to get whipped or not
person (1:21:35 AM):wisdom lies in true, constant consciousness
person (1:21:45 AM):that’s what taqwa really is
person (1:21:55 AM):you are constantly aware of His presence
person (1:22:01 AM):so you act accordingly
person (1:22:10 AM):you don’t act rashly because you fear what you may do to him
person (1:22:23 AM):having fear as the head of wisdom is an imbalanced mindset
larka (1:22:33 AM):bec those people know fully what this means: “O Allah, there is no safe place to hide from You except You, we run from You to You”
larka (1:22:49 AM):and then they move from that to a more advanced state
larka (1:23:25 AM):the Prophet (asws) said that in a famous hadith, i wouldnt contravene him
person (1:23:28 AM):perhaps it’s necessary to feel fear somewhere along the path to consciousness
person (1:23:38 AM):but that’s not the destination
person (1:23:44 AM):you should not be stuck on fear
person (1:23:57 AM):if all you feel is fear, then you are not running To Him
person (1:26:01 AM):alright
person (1:26:10 AM):though I don’t think we’re going to come to some easy agreement
larka (1:26:34 AM): the Prophet (asws) said that in a famous hadith, i wouldnt contravene him
those arent my words
i said i dont understand how that cud be, because i havent experienced or reached that height of wisdom, even tho i can come up with answers intellectually
yes, there is a pleasure and contentment deep in fear, when it applies to Allah, like that du’a i quoted
“we run from You to You”
which is found in the Qur’an
larka (1:32:16 AM):just as someone is supposed to experience the Jamal and Beauty of Allah, if someone is *only* experiencing that aspect of Him, then his knowledge of Allah is deficient and limited, the goal is to experience as many aspects of Him, including the Jalal (rigorous severity) of Allah, and the more encompassing knowledge you have of Allah, then the closer to completion u arrive at
larka (1:32:26 AM):and Allah puts some of His slaves in that state of “we run from You to You” because it is actually one of the quickest ways to be consumed in Allah
larka (1:32:39 AM):so Islam isnt a guessing game…. it requires experience of Allah’s Names and their meanings… *EXPERIENCE*
larka (1:32:50 AM):how does the Name of Wadud taste like? how does the Name of Quddus taste like? how does the Name al-Qahhar taste like?
person (1:32:51 AM):ok…
larka (1:32:59 AM):what are their effects in the heart? in the creation around one?
person (1:33:06 AM):but that’s exactly my point
larka (1:33:08 AM):just as at the same time being stuck in fear, and having that state of fear block or veil u from Allah is also a deficiency
person (1:33:16 AM):you experience the many beauties and intricacies of God
person (1:33:31 AM):but ultimately
person (1:34:37 AM):at the core of everything
person (1:34:37 AM):should be your true, unquavering love for Him
person (1:34:37 AM):this is the essential truth we must always return to
person (1:34:37 AM):and all along
person (1:34:37 AM):this is really all I’ve been saying
person (1:34:50 AM):props on “how does the Name of Wadud taste like? how does the Name of Quddus taste like? how does the Name al-Qahhar taste like?”
person (1:34:51 AM):that’s exactly the attitude we should be trying to emulate
person (1:35:01 AM):but we stick out our tongue
person (1:35:11 AM):because of our fervent love and desire
person (1:38:27 AM):to be closer to Him and to be enveloped in his mercy and compassion
larka (1:39:45 AM): alhumduillah
larka (1:39:46 AM):salaam
larka (1:39:51 AM):have a good night
larka (1:42:05 AM):alright…. i might have been a little rough, i hope you werent hurt or offended
person (1:42:21 AM):haha not at all
person (1:42:21 AM):see
person (1:42:21 AM):love motivates me
person (1:42:21 AM):loool
person (1:42:35 AM):that’s love in practice
person (1:42:50 AM):I accept what’s handed to me with contentment
person (1:42:51 AM):boo yaaa
larka (1:44:40 AM):ok good, salaam to both, and remember, talk is cheap