Nov 11 2007
Breaking Down Barriers
Salaam
I have decided to make a public blog. And what better time then to do it while fajr the “dawn” of a new day. Sharing myself thoughts and sentiments while I am away from home should be made a priority after reading textbooks (and everything is done) nevertheless, I shall try to be consistant. Blogs I have made in the past before were anonymous because truths are hard to tell friends and I am a painfully honest person (at least I think so, most of the time). (youtube.com/watch?v=KuKCda-cFew) “Will You Hate Me?” by Dawud Wharnsby perfectly echoes this sentiment. When I accidentally came upon it while looking for “All the Children of the World” by the same artist my jaw dropped and my eyes misted—for all my “self-destructive” honesty and sincerity—at least about things that matter—it made me pride myself in it when I was in a point of my life where I highly doubted the vitality of it.
My life is like a rollercoaster (pretty much like everyone else’s), and I am not that articulate so I can’t promise that you will comprehend me in every post.
Blogging since 2005, I have never ever truly and fully associated and identified myself in my blogs. The idea of it genuinely terrifies me. And that I have actually made the decision to also post this on my facebook horrifies me even further; but fear is a wall needing to be dispelled in the journey of life so I’m set on breaking it down.
My past blogs were mostly born out of pure anguish, pain and emotion. Today, at this moment however, I feel like I am taking a pragmatic approach (which means for me generally balanced in the real world because I am overly-emotional—I know this but I still recklessly express myself because I have promised myself to and been handsomely rewarded for it).
Oye I sound so egotistical. That’s another thing. How am I able to express myself fully while thinking about what the reader is thinking, assuming?—there are many things in your head; in your cultural mindful context sound perfectly fine, until you speak them. Letting the heavy truths come out of your heart, rolling up your throat, felted by your tongue and released into the judging, misunderstanding and critical world… it’s scary. But I have set upon myself to share.
The world’s too small for walls.
