Born Confused

iqra (2:26:31 AM): assalaamu alaikum
me (2:26:50 AM): hey, walayakumassaalmwarathmatullah
me (2:27:05 AM): can’t sleep?
iqra (2:27:23 AM): umm lol not really
iqra (2:27:24 AM): im just up
iqra (2:27:35 AM): not really as in i can sleep if i want to
iqra (2:27:36 AM): aH
me (2:27:48 AM): same here alhumdullah
me (2:28:05 AM): wassup iqra?
iqra (2:28:17 AM): need your insight
iqra (2:28:26 AM): love for the sake of Allah
iqra (2:28:29 AM): what is it?
iqra (2:28:38 AM): if you love somebody for another reason
iqra (2:28:40 AM): other than for Allah
iqra (2:28:55 AM): is it wrong?
me (2:28:59 AM): is this a girl?
iqra (2:29:05 AM): lol no not for me dude
me (2:29:17 AM): oh…sory context helps
iqra (2:29:20 AM): haha
iqra (2:29:25 AM): ok well soembody asked me a question
me (2:29:29 AM): is it a niqabi?
me (2:29:30 AM): haha
me (2:29:33 AM): ok ok
iqra (2:29:35 AM): that im not sure how to answer
me (2:29:38 AM): *serious*
iqra (2:29:46 AM): and its more in the context of
iqra (2:29:50 AM): love between ppl
iqra (2:29:56 AM): not necessarily partners/couples
iqra (2:30:01 AM): but like your friends
iqra (2:30:11 AM): and just generally ur brothers and sisters
iqra (2:30:15 AM): your friends
iqra (2:30:18 AM): be they muslim or non muslim
me (2:38:11 AM): Loving for the sake of Allah can come in various forms, oddly I was talking about this with another person today and as you probably know one who does this is in the Shade of Allah SWT on the Last Day inshAllah. From what I know (or think I know) loving for the sake of Allah can come in various forms. Some cases I know of was when there was a student of knowledge who would sneek into his peers rooms and do their laundry and iron and fold the clothes for them. And yet another case is when this two brothers in Islam committed to each other to remind each other to be in a constant state of wudu.
me (2:38:42 AM): Loving for not this dunya and gain here
me (2:38:54 AM): but for someones deen
me (2:39:11 AM): and love of Allah
iqra (2:39:25 AM): can you love a non muslim then?
iqra (2:39:36 AM): for the sake of Allah?
me (2:39:48 AM): Non-muslims can love God too.
iqra (2:39:57 AM): true
me (2:40:13 AM): their religion can make them beautiful and virtuous
me (2:40:37 AM): or rather not thier religion but perhaps their love of God
me (2:40:58 AM): and good, a blessing and manifestation of Allah
me (2:42:00 AM): Also there’s a hadith that when you love your fellow sister/brother you should tell them
me (2:42:23 AM): [regardless of “no homo”]
me (2:42:38 AM): let me try and find it
iqra (2:44:29 AM): lol @ no homo
iqra (2:44:37 AM): yeah ive heard it before also
me (2:44:57 AM): A man was sitting with our Holy Prophet when another one passed. The sitting one said, “O Messenger of Allah! I love this man.” The Prophet said, “Have you told him?” The man said, “No.” The Prophet said, “Tell him!” The man rose to his feet and went to the man who was passing by and said, “I love you for the same of Allah.” He said, “May Allah whom you love, love you in return!”
me (2:45:15 AM): Abu Daud; Kitab-al-Adab; Tirmidhi; Kitab-al-Zuhd
me (2:45:21 AM): and reported by Anas bin Malik
me (2:45:30 AM): yeah ok
me (2:45:47 AM): heehee
me (2:47:01 AM): did that answer your question?
iqra (2:47:30 AM): aH it put things in perspective
me (2:47:49 AM): Alhumdullah

A friend shared a story…

“Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can’t buy.”

Me: that. made. me. cry.

“People start their lives at last when they are able to live for something other than themselves.”–Albert Einstein.

Jazakullahkhair.

Painter: Oh come on Ilana, isn’t that a bit melodramatic? Do you also start weeping at witnessing the humanitarian edge of capitalism when they bring down the prices of flower pots to 50%?

Me: Haha, oh come on Painter, isn’t that a bit of an over simplification and lack of appreciation of the human spirit and it’s capacity for self sacrifice and good? Or are you too pessimistic and self-absorbed?

Painter: It is the nature of things that those at one extreme become that which is at the other extreme…but yeah, you do cry at flower shops don’t you :)

Me: Realization of the above mentioned fact is what should motivate us to be humble and help grasp the significance and true depth of the beauty of good. It is the freedom of will that makes morality and virtue possible.

Painter: Indeed. Very well said.

Me: And I cry for flowers not pots. ;)

A mask, a sign of morality–trying to keep numb when I know the time will come when all is said and done and no turning back, a lump in my throat trying to relax but we all know there’s a subtle unrest as I blink back tears realization dawns; numb is not acceptable, tears irrefutable– not expressing inexcusable. Painful to show the love when loving hurts; selfless perhaps–ego destroyed, sweetness of iman trying to sustain because without the True Reality ever present I am in pain.

Random thoughts, random words, inspiration hits–widens and challenges the wit… unable to articulate in such confines, so simply art, music, dance are there to express the love of the divine.

Eh: so why do you think the Muslim Ummah declined?
Me: many reasons… one of is the Muslim Ummah having this dual identity crisis that persists in the middle east resulting from colonialism. They want to be “Modern” (the western way) but that has some serious growing pains… islamic growing pains–and I feel that inshAllah they might be moved to find a better way to modernize
inshAllah inshAllah
it’s like when I go downtown DC
and I see this concrete jungle, this separation between nature and human
Eh: right, about it?
Me: why can’t these buildings be a part of the nature and their natural surroundings?
why must the roots be buried under something lifeless–trying to separate us from the true reality–Allah?
Sometimes I image the soil underneath it all teeming with life
there has to be a better way
why can’t our masjids be apart of the outside and the gardens like in Andalusia?
Eh: they can be, its still not too late
Me: I believe in that but HOW?

I will miss my youngest sisters attempt to copy me and make wudu.
I’ll miss how they stood next to me in prayer—head on my elbow.
I’ll miss holding my small sisters when they cry and seeing them laugh and squeal as I roar and chase them in the backyard.
I’ll miss listening to my brother’s confessions—just trying to get certain things he was ashamed of off his chest and feeling so honored he choose to tell me.
I’ll miss talking about hope, future and boys in a closet with my sister until the wee hours of the morning and perhaps will miss even the time where she tried to coach me in how to make sexy faces in a mirror—it took 10 minutes of trying not to laugh.
I’ll miss singing and holding my sisters; stroking them and holding them close and once in the dark I can feel one’s eyes widen and her voice full with awe; “Your amazing”.
I’ll miss playfully fighting with brothers, laughing, challenges, boasting and putting them in their place—for the meanwhile.
I’ll miss running in the grass; barefoot, without a hijab—totally wild and free in the dark—as I and the kids made faces at our uncles in the dining room as they sipped chai with Baba.
I’ll miss hugging my biggest brother and then conspiring with the kids to attack and tackle him: yes, we went through with it but we were unsuccessful.
I’ll miss a brother’s sweetness—I’ll miss tickling another until he laughed like a maniac and sitting on him—oh yes, and I’ll miss throwing pillows at all of them.
I’ll miss the wind, I’ll miss the blue sky which was so vivid in contrast to the tall trees.
I’ll miss a sister’s quiet strength; another, her smile; another her recklessness—putting Indiana Jones to shame.
I’ll miss one of the tiniest sisters asking me to put on the hijab.
I’ll miss hearing “I love you” and even “I aann a princess! You ugly” hahaha.
I’ll miss how all my brothers and sisters gathered; asking about deen, fiqh, tasweer—questioning, questioning, questioning…

And yes, I’ll even miss pinching my father’s cheeks, and when I am delighted or I kiss him—seeing his whole face brighten up. Yeah, it’s a sight to behold.

Jazakullahkhair Oh Allah for letting me miss.

When a certain emperor commented that he would not act in a certain way because it was against his interest Confucius replied ‘It is well your majesty thinks of his self interest. Soon the ministers will think of their interests and following their own interests none shall think of the interest of the nation’.

A political system based upon the tyranny of a patriarchal father figure cannot help but produce a system where force becomes the only virtue. In such an atmosphere where men have epicene characteristics there is no sense of personal morality.

To quote Ibn Khaldun

“Severe punishment does harm to the student, especially little children, because it belongs among those matters that engender bad habit. Students, slaves, and servants who are brought up with injustice and tyrannical force are overwhelmed by it.

It enervates them and causes them to feel oppressed. It makes them lazy and induces them to lie and be insincere. That is, their outward behavior differs from what they are thinking because they are afraid that they will have to suffer tyrannical treatment if they are honest. Thus, they are taught trickery and fraud. This becomes their custom and character. They lose the quality that accompanies social and political structures and engenders humaneness in people – in other words, the urge to protect and defend themselves and their homes – and they become passively dependent upon others.

They succumb to indolence and fail to acquire the virtues and qualities of good character. Thus, they fail to achieve their potential and never reach the birthright of their humanity. This results in their reversion to the “lowest of the low.”

This is the fate of every nation that fell under the yoke of tyranny and from it learned the meaning of injustice. This can be affirmed by merely examining any person who is not in control of his own affairs and has no power to assure his own safety. “

Prolegomena - Ibn Khaldun

All of society becomes BEGHAYRAT.